In today’s blog post we’re going to show you how to plan a date for your wife. All you need is a little creativity and the right plan.
If you asked us how many dates Scott’s taken Lisa on…we honestly couldn’t tell you…lots and we’ve lost count. Some were planned well in advance, some were planned in the moment and some, admittedly, had no planning and were spontaneous (see here for more of those date ideas!).
(Scott: I love taking Lisa on dates – the way she smiles just lights up my world and it feels almost like…what I should be doing as a good husband (and natural provider).)
Of course, it’s hard to always be original. Another dinner date can seem rather…well…boring after a while.
So how do you plan a date for your wife? For his wife, Scott utilizes a set of factors (kind of like a recipe) for figuring out a range of date ideas and then adds a small twist to make his decision that much more special. The factors include your wife’s personality type, her love language, your budget and available time.
When is the date?
As we always say, time is the first factor we are planning a date. Why? Well, simply put it’s because it quickly rules out a lot of ideas. There’s no reason to book a seven-course dinner date if the two of you are exhausted from a rough week of work – you’ll both fall asleep in your starters!
Naturally, there’s not much use in booking surfing lessons at midnight. That’s obvious!
So, if your date is on a Tuesday night (as one of ours always is), then let’s first consider only date ideas that will work for such an occasion.
How long should the date run for?
Secondly, let’s consider how long we want the date to run for. A 3-course meal will usually go for about 1.5-2 hours and that’s fine if you’re both keen to head home afterward for ‘Netflix and chill’. But if this is something more special and you’ve got 3-6 hours to burn, let’s go look at something a little more from the heart and meaningful!
What is your wife’s personality type and what are her passions?
How would you describe your wife? Loud party rocker or the quieter/zen kind at the yoga studio?
We’re aiming to plan a date that matches your wife’s personality. Lisa’s rather extroverted with a deep appreciation of the arts – so would buying her tickets to the Barcelona Beach Festival make her happy? I think we can tell that it did!
What is your wife passionate about? Are there incredible works of literature on her bedside table or where she sits on the couch? Is she currently blogging about the restaurant she went to today on her lunch break or is she kicking back on the bed listening to her favorite band on Spotify?
Use these behaviors to deduce her passions and then book something which aligns with this. Music is easy – see what local bands are playing or better yet, find out when her favorite musicians are playing in your town.
If she’s a foodie, look on Trip Advisor for somewhere you both haven’t been before and book a table.
Does she lead an active lifestyle?
Are both your partner and yourself fitness fanatics? Perfect! Try tennis or squash or even laser tag (one of our favorites).
If kicking back is more her thing after a hard day’s work – why not try a couple’s massage at a day spa or relaxing in a sauna. Catering the date to what her passions are as well as how she’s feeling is a sure winner (it shows you’re listening which is huge).
Lisa loves being active – she often performs in aerial acrobatics and lyra. Scott’s also active at the gym but lyra isn’t really his thing! So, when taking Lisa out on a date with an active theme, Scott often books performances (e.g. at the Sydney Opera house) where professionals dazzle the crowds with these kinds of tricks. Lisa loves it (especially when the waiter brings over a spectacular bottle of champagne I sneakily ordered!).
What is your wife’s love language?
Love Languages represent the means of communicating love to our partner and also how we ourselves receive love. We can thus use them in our date planning!
The Five Love Languages are gift-giving, physical touch, acts of service, words of affirmation and quality time and are discussed by Gary Chapman in his book ‘The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate’.
The below infographic provides examples of how each Love Language may be expressed (note however that this a summary, not an exhaustive list of all examples).
Your partner and yourself can find the quiz here (we highly recommend it as it would revolutionize how you two communicate! Now back to the planning).
The below show’s Lisa’s results of the quiz. Her core Love Languages are Physical Touch, Acts of Service and Gifts.
In each the below table I’ve provided some more examples of date ideas and the love language associated.
Lisa is rather extroverted, and (like Scott) is a nerd at heart, a foodie and also very active. Given this and her love languages, wine tasting, music festivals/concerts, rock climbing and exquisite restaurants are great date ideas for her!
Don’t worry too much if some of the date ideas seem to satisfy several Love Languages. As long as you’re roughly right, it will still be an amazing date!
How much can you spend?
Alas, dates generally do cost money and the price of love often comes with a steep premium. But you don’t need to always break the bank to have the perfect date – sometimes it’s more meaningful when you express yourself from the heart.
If the budget is tight, fear not. Home cooking French food for a foodie can often cost less than $20. Beach walks for nature/beach lovers are free and going for a stroll to buy gelato is easily less than $10.
Putting it all together
Well, now you know our recipe for planning a date with your wife as Scott has hundreds of times for Lisa. All you need to do is consider a few date ideas and see if they match your partner based on the factors we’ve noted!
We have a whole list in our earlier blog ‘Our Top 10 Date Ideas for Kissing’ in which we’ve sorted the dates by personality type, love language and even done the leg work of costing them all (as well as adding our own pro tips!). We wish you all the best for your date!
There’s one extra tip we have for you (which works absolute wonders for us) – when Scott’s booking the date, he just does it! He doesn’t ask for Lisa’s permission to confirm that she’ll like it, he makes the decision and books the date.
As such, this doesn’t mean that the date will always be perfect – but, it will highlight your confidence and ability to make decisions (which women love!).